Top 7 Procedures For Marriage In Adoka
Top 7 procedures for marriage in Adoka are very important. Marriage is the union of man and woman to form a home. Ethnic groups have different procedures for marriage and the people of Adoka are not left out.
The village has a good cultural background. The marriage culture is very dear to them. The reason for placing marriage in high esteem is because it involves human life. For two adults to come together from different backgrounds and ideology is not easy.
The community frown at illegal marriage without due process. Even if you want to go for church marriage or court marriage you must perform the culture and tradition demands. The two-family must seat down and reach an agreement before the marriage becomes legal.
The marriage procedure in Adoka is from generation to generation. Most of the adjustment in the marriage procedure is to match up with economic realities. Because prices of things in the market are not static.
The marriage ceremony normally takes place in the bride’s family. Sometimes the bride’s family can decide to take the marriage to a village or town of residence. The arrangement is a consensual arrangement within the family cycle.
Marriage even though a thing of joy involves a great sacrifice. The sacrifice is to make sure every go smoothly without negative implication in the future. Because if the marriage is not properly done, any child given birth automatically belongs to the bride.
The truth of the matter is that even strangers coming to marry from Adoka community should know the fact. The bride must communicate effectively the tradition of the community to her husband-to-be.
If the marriage is intra-community, the groom is adequately aware of the necessary things to do. All the procedures for marriage are very important. Sometimes people want to cut corners. Cutting corners can have negative implications in the future.
During the marriage ceremony, it is expected that the husband is present or the representative of the husband. Sometimes is done openly or indoors. The open marriage is attended by the community. The indoor marriage is the one that the family attends alone.
This article is designed to show the world the top 7 procedures for marriage in Adoka. It is very necessary because will gives outsiders the clip of how the marriage is done in the community. This article will go a long way to amend and allow contributions and corrections.
First Introduction
The first introduction is very vital. The bride takes the groom to the family member first to meet her parents. The bride must inform the parents of the coming of the visitors. Sometimes the bride tells the parents the reason for their visitation.
If the parent consent to their daughter then the groom are very free to come. But if the parents are not comfortable with the date they will have to adjust. Sometimes the groom’s family visits without the consent of the bride.
During the first introduction, the grooms declare his intention to the family. The declaration is done with either palm wine or cola nut. When making the first introduction is expected you go with one or two members of your family.
You have to tell them your reason for the visit and tell them more about yourself. If the parent is cool with you they will call their daughter to ask her if she truly knows and if she is aware of your intention. It is when she accepts the proposal that the palm will be received and the celebration commenced.
Sincerely speaking, the first introduction matters a lot in Adoka. No family will want to skip that aspect because of its value to their daughter. It shows that the woman or the wife has a place called home and she believes and respects the family so much.
Second Introduction
The second introduction is done in a lighter mood. The groom will have to bring his father or mother or representative of his family. During the second introduction, it is expected that the groom buys some gifts for the bride’s mother or the siblings.
During the second visitation, both families got to be familiar with each other. They discuss at length what the marriage should look like. Sometimes they discussed things like what is the groom doing for a leaving. Second introduction is one of top 7 procedures for marriage in Adoka
During the second visitation, the family has to call the extended family. Both the bride’s parents from the maternal and paternal sides must be represented. Because they also have to add their view and contribution to the marriage.
On a general note, the second introduction forms the basis for the marriage. Sometimes after the first introduction, the bride’s parent always tells the groom’s family to wait for their reply. The second introduction is the avenue to either said yes or no if they are satisfied or not.
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Collection of List
After the second visitation, the groom’s family can now go ahead with the collection of the list. Before now, the collection of lists is verbal. The recent development is that the list is well-typed and arranged accordingly. Every necessary item is on the list.
The collection of the list is a family affair. The bride and one family member can go and get the list. During the collection of the list, it is expected that you buy some drinks and sometimes go with money. Because the list is not given to you free of charge. Collection of list is one of top 7 procedures for marriage in Adoka
When you get the list is expected you go through it. If there are areas you are not clear with, then you can iron it out. During the collection of the list, you can start making some payments if you are financially stable.
The list is very fair and is negotiable to some extent. Most family allows negotiation but some family does not accept it. If you are comfortable with the list you can go ahead and report to the family. The list contains items necessary for the marriage.
Fixing Of Date
Fixing the date is as important as anything. Both parents have to meet and agree on a specific date. The groom is allowed to deposit some money for the entertainment of guests during the marriage day. The two families must agree on a specific date and time.
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During the fixing of the date, the bride’s family cooks enough food. It is a sign that the marriage is very close. To fix the date is very brief and sharp. But before fixing the date, the bride’s parents will still ask the groom again if he is comfortable with the list or not.
Paying of Bride’s Price
Paying the bride price is considered the most important procedure in Adoka. It gives the legal right to be married traditionally. The payment can be done before the marriage day or on that very date. Payment of bride price depends on the individual family.
The Adoka community has a generally fixed bride. Some family collects below that based on an understanding with both families. Some placed value on their daughter’s academic qualifications. The bride price for a graduate is quite different from non-graduates.
Any marriage without the bride price being paid is just null and void. No matter how little the money its an evidence of the marriage. Once the bride price is paid the husband and wife can start leaving together.
The pride price can only be refunded if the marriage crashed. Because in as much as the bride price remains with her she cannot marry another husband. The implication is that the ancestor bears witness to the bride price.
Without a doubt paying of bride price is one of the top marriage procedures in Adoka Benue state. During the bride price, the bride will be asked again by her parents if they can collect the bride price for her suitor.
Before collecting the bride price, the bride’s family will check the list one after the other. The checking of the list is to ensure the necessary items are provided. The items on the list may include things like wrappers, drinks, youth money, community money, and money for foodstuff.
Marriage Proper
The marriage proper is the celebration. The bride and groom invite their loved ones to celebrate with them. The most important thing about the marriage proper is to let the general public bear witness to the marriage. Marriage proper is one of top 7 procedures for marriage in Adoka
It is the ceremonial aspect of the traditional marriage in Adoka. This time the groom can come with as many people he wants likewise to the bride. People travel far and near to witness the occasion. Some women have to Assoebi for the day.
The wife is expected to show and accept her husband before the mammoth crowd. Without leaving any stone unturned, that day is a day loves can present their gifts and also say a word of encouragement to them.
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White Wedding
The white wedding is not compulsory. But it allows the Christian believers to be joined by their pastor. Even in the church, the pastor will have to seek the consent of the husband and wifeifs the necessary bride price has been paid.